The best part about this is how this kid admits that he’s never had an erection before. How dare that damn rattlesnake just crawl in that boy’s pants and decide to show itself like a jack-in-the-box. Do they really just let those things out anywhere? (more…)
Archive for the ‘LOLz’ Category
Poking the one-eyed monster
Wednesday, August 26th, 2009The First Step in Surviving the Zombie Apocalypse = Calculating Zombie Exponential Growth Rate / Time
Tuesday, August 18th, 2009
In a moment of drunken brilliance, a collaboration of students from Canada’s renowned University of Ottawa published the first-ever mathematical model for surviving a zombie attack. This mathematical model encourages humans to begin the process of zombie eradication as soon as possible and as hard as possible–news from the file marked duh!
This model, where S = susceptibles, Z = zombies and R = removed, is useful in calculating how quickly zombies will outnumber the given human population!
The mathletes win again.
[ Source: Wired ]
Good luck is hard to come by
Tuesday, July 14th, 2009
Throwing the bride’s bouquet has been a long-standing [ and in modern times, dreadful ] luck-wishing tradition, but one Italian woman decided to spice it up by throwing her bridal bouquet from an airplane. On its departure, the bouquet suddenly got tangled and consequently, sucked into the plane’s engines, causing the plane to crash into a nearby hostel. None of the wedding party was aboard the plane. The pilot and the person tasked with the bouquet throwing were aboard and one person was badly injured–suffering multiple head injuries and severe fractures– but the wedding reception carried on. (more…)
Forty years of Sunny Days
Tuesday, July 14th, 2009Sesame Street officially turns 40 today! In their ripe old age, the muppets need some time to party!
Drive Thru Fail
Friday, July 10th, 2009While on my way to having yet another exciting friday in the office, I decided to stop at the BK for some grub–WTFBBQ Stackers and french fries sound awesome when you budget for these economic times by eating in for the past two weeks. I gave myself plenty of extra time to get to work–forty minutes to be exact–and made sure to stop off at the BK by work. It doesn’t have the friendliest customer service or the lowest hold times, but the quality of the food is decent–moreso, than the one by the house. Anyway, I knew I was in for serious lag time when I pulled into line and the white grandma car in front of me was trying to talk to the lady in the speakerbox with the front of the car, oh, a good 5 feet in front of the box. As she yelled the eardrums of everyone within a two-mile raidus away, I couldn’t help but overhear that she was ordering 6 value meals and 2 kids meals. I looked at the clock — 1:49pm. Subtracting away twenty minutes from the clock set in my car gave me the actual time of 1:29pm. 16 minutes to clock into work.
Of course, it took nearly ten minutes for the lady in box to understand the conglomeration of a words, value meal numbers, and + and - special orders coming out of the woman’s mouth, and six more minutes for the BK worker to repeat it back to the lady in the car correctly, before the little white car pulled around and it was my turn to order my simple BBQ Stacker. Relieved by my short order, the woman sweetly told me to pull around to the second window.
An unexpected error lurked around the corner: (more…)